Good Night and Good Luck!

Ever since the Fourth of July, I've been thinking about American values. Overall, I think I like them.

As American as apple pie. Count me in!

The great American melting pot. Just let me lick it when you're done cooking!

Consumerism. Absolutely! Show me what to consume, and I'm happy to oblige.

Pragmatism. I definitely consider myself pragmatic. More in a practical way than in a theoretical way, though.

But there is one value I'm not quite sure about: diversity. Take a look:




Every night I have certain expectations. And what are you supposed to do when one night you get the scrawny little treat to the left, and another night you get a big slice of bacon and the next night a chicken filet? It seems like it would be better to go with another American value, the well-balanced meal. A chicken filet, with bacon, and a little garnish of "power bone" please!

It seems that this would fulfill that great American dream of E Pluribus Unum: "Out of the many, one."

Now, recently, things became pretty scarce. We had worked our way through the evening treats, and the cupboards were getting pretty bare:


This led me into a very Great Depression.

But we went to Petsmart yesterday, and me and Scoche got to engage in a little bit of freedom of choice. Notice that we did what all true Americans do, we super-sized it!


Now that's all American. Not only is it really, really big... but it provides justice for all!