Otherwise Occupied

I am sorry I haven't updated in a few days! As the picture below shows, I've been otherwise occupied.




Now, you are no doubt thinking, why would chewing a bone take up so much time? That's because the finer points of bone consumption are lost on humans, who often throw away the bones of their victims without even enjoying them (the bones, that is). In fact, I've heard that the only time humans make much fuss over a bone is when they eat a turkey, and even then they just make a wish, snap the bone in half, and it still ends up in the trash. If that were me, I'd be wishing I could chew on that bone! Better yet, why wish? I'd just grab it and run!

Last Thanksgiving I was only six months old, so I hadn't quite figured out the system. But I'm already making plans for this Thanksgiving. I will not let those bones go to waste!

Anyway, I wanted to share with you exactly why bone chewing takes the time it does.

First, you have to get mentally psyched up. As with all meals, as soon as you see a human preparing something on the counter you need to get in position and get ready. There are many aspects to this preparation -- mental, physical, balance, and especially attitude. This last point (attitude) is especially important, and it's really a lifelong journey.

Second, you have to eat the bone of course. I admit this part actually goes pretty quickly.

Third, you have to eat Scrappy's bone. If you have accomplished step #2 properly, you are usually in a good position to get hold of Scrappy's portion, which probably has a lot of meat left on it. She eats slow.

Fourth, you have to rest. All the mental energy consumed by those first three steps can really wear a whippet out.

Fifth, when you awake, you'll feel bloated, but Scrappy will still look gaunt. This will require a short period of self-justification and sometimes apology. (Scrappy, if you're reading this -- I apologize in advance for next time!)

Sixth, it's time to get psyched up about your next meal!

See? There's a lot that goes into it! In fact, I'm in the middle of step #6 right now. I better get going so I can give this my best effort.

Till next time!
Smarty

The Joke's On Me?

Yesterday we went to a race meet! Fortunately that scary Otis person never showed up. We did get to see that blonde haired kid who owns Wendy – I like him, although I like him better when he brings that nice little girl and her mom with him. And mom [big people call her "Scoche"] got to spend the day with that nice woman who takes care of my sister Lucy. I love going over to her house, it’s non-stop action! Mom must have felt VERY lucky – I can only imagine all the fun they had over there.

But I got to have fun, too. I ran in three races! I wish I’d been able to run in four, but I think my female owner was a little confused.

You see, last week on the way home from a race I got talking to Scrappy. We had just seen Lucy so naturally we were talking about our puppy days. So we were laughing about that time we were all puppies and were running around the house, and I ran right into the kitchen gate! So we were joking around, and so I started limping around – you know, pretending like it had just happened. We were having a blast!

Well, apparently the female owner didn’t like this because she got all upset. In fact, she hardly let me do any running all week! She kept talking about my shoulder. And then all day yesterday I’m hearing them worry about running me in all four programs. And I’m thinking, “It was only a joke! My shoulder’s fine!” And I try to tell them that, but of course they don’t understand. It’s like sometimes they don’t even listen.

So there I am, stuck in the crate during the fourth race! That’s the last time I joke about an injury… I suppose we better add that one to the etiquette list!

Well, I had fun anyway.

Then today, Sunday, was a relaxing day. The owners went away in the morning in their nice clothes, and I stayed home and read the funnies. Can anyone help me understand this one? It doesn’t make sense:

(Click to enlarge)

Why would anyone be that mean? They call this the "funnies"?! Maybe the joke's on me this time, all I know is I'm glad I live in a nice home!

Mom's Etiquette Advice

See that picture? That's my mom. When I grow up, I want to be just like her!

Today she gave me some tips on etiquette, which means "putting others first." She said this even applies in racing. (See? I would have never thought of that. She's so wise.)

First, she said, enter the box with some dignity. Get all four paws inside, nose to the gate, and by all means make sure your tail is in place. This will allow the others to also enter their boxes in a graceful and timely manner.

Second, keep your talking to the boxes. You can always finish your conversation with your friends later - once that gate swings open, shut up and run!

Third, she said, don't crowd the bunny. Ironically, your job is not to get to the bunny first - you'd have to slow down too early to do that! Instead, let the others at it first. Any respectable owner will let you have a taste of it before you leave the track.

A fourth tip is to go easy on the line judges. If you insist on being first to cross the line (and you really should try, she advised), be enough strides ahead so as to not cause unnecessary confusion.

Fifth, she said, and this is most important. When it comes to the race itself, remember... ladies first!

And becoming a lady is what etiquette is all about.

A Little Worried

I'm a little worried today. I overheard my owners talking about taking me to "Otis" in "Massachusetts." Who is Otis??

When they left for the day, I snuck onto the computer (between naps) and did an internet search. When I searched for "Otis Massachusetts" on Google images this is who I found:



Oh no! I don't want to go to Otis - he looks weird! Is he even a boy, or is that a girl? What's with that haircut? I think I would be embarrassed to be seen with him. Waitaminute, will he even take me for walks?? He looks snobby.

Please don't make me go to Otis!! I'm sorry I encouraged Scrappy to eat that mailman! I'm sorry for hogging the best bed! I'm sorry for everything!!

HELP ME, SOMEBODY, PLEASE!!

Secrets of Successful Resting

Successful racing and successful eating are two topics dear to my heart. But another important factor if one is to be a whippet of character is knowing when to rest. And how to rest.

I'm into power naps. A good power nap should last from about 9pm till 6:30 am, and resume after breakfast. But it is especially important to rest after a big race meet, as you can see here:


Of course, it's also important to have friends who like to rest also. Usually I read my comic books in bed, but I was especially tired the night this picture was taken:


Speaking of naps, I better go now!

Secrets of Successful Racing

Racing doesn't come without some preparation. I'd like to share in this post one of my secrets. It's called BREAKFAST. It first occurred to me that breakfast was especially important when I saw my male owner starting his day off with a hearty meal. Once I realized how important this was, I began requesting bigger breakfasts, and earlier!

However, it really wasn't until recently that my owners finally caught on. They recently got smart (no pun intended) and filled the backyard with breakfast treats, as you can see below. Now I'm able to have a pre-breakfast breakfast every morning!

I would say this was probably one of the biggest energy boosters that helped me over this past weekend.


Yes, indeed, I should have plenty of energy for months to come....

Whodunnit?

Today a crime was committed. You may have seen the photo in the newspaper:


The police investigated... The living room carpet was taped off for hours.



Finally the culprit was found and abducted...


The questions still haunt us. Why, Scrappy, WHY?

Come On In!

Hello and welcome to Smarty Spot! We spend a lot of time around here looking out into the "real world." So we thought we'd show you what things are like around here.

This is me, Smarty (top), and my sister, Scrappy (bottom). Her original name was "Skit." I think she changed it for religous reasons, but I'm not positive.